18 February 2014
726
R. Linda:
This week Dragon flew in on her broom to "help take care of the poor invalid." That would be me. I want you to know I have been doing very well on me own and certainly the last person in the world I want to care for me be me mother-in-law. However, she's here, I be trapped, nothing to be done about it. SIGH.
Today I had another PT session, this time with another guy, the owner of the place. I called in early because me scheduled 3:00 appointment would be at the height of the snowstorm we are currently having. We have these snow storms it seems on the very days I have PT scheduled, and be it known the snow isn't an inch or two, it's more like the inch an hour for seven to ten hours.
Since I cannot drive safely in the snow, I need a driver. Guess who? Since we both can't fit on her broomstick, it was decided to take me trusty Saturn. Yes, it is still running!
She dropped me off and decided to go across the highway to the mall and do some shopping. Thank God she wasn't in the PT place with me. I could just see them bending me legs backwards and me crying, "Uncle," and Dragon telling them to bend more!
As it was I got quite the workout. I was surprised at the end of it I could stand, let alone walk!
While I was being put into contortions I only thought long skinny balloons could be used for, this other physical therapist stopped by me table in the middle of me pleading for the other therapist to please stop, and asks me if I left a vodka bottle when I was there yesterday.
"NO!" I moaned loudly, "But I could use a shot of it now."
Seems someone had a flask full of vodka they left at the table I had been working on. Wasn't me, I'd have had Irish whiskey, but someone had that flask.
Just as the torture stopped for me to catch me breath before it began again, I thought to scan the room for the vodka flask because I was tempted. However, me mobile phone text messaging was going off (I have the Sherwood Forest trumpet sound for Dragon), so I knew it was her. I ignored it. Wrong move, she came in to see "What are you doing?" Like she didn't know.
I told her I had fifteen more minutes of fun and I'd be out.
"Okay then, I am going out to wipe off the car. The snow is really coming down." And off she went and back to the torture went I -- vodka-less.
I happened to look out the large window at the parking lot trying to get me mind off the pain and who do I see but the Dragon with a long snow brush brushing off the car. I noticed she got one side done and started the other. Then as she got that side done, she sees she has to go back and brush off the other side because the snow is falling faster than she can clear the windows. Then something occurred to me, yes it did . . . she was clearing off someone else's car. Yes, she was. I started laughing just as me legs were bent near into me back and because the therapist thought I was mocking the pain, he pushed in more and I came close to screaming like a girl.
Damn, that Dragon!
When I was finally released from hell, I went lurching outside to the snow world of the parking lot and I informed Madame Dragon she was working on the wrong vehicle. Oi! I was of a mind she had found that flask of vodka and that might explain the mental abrasion. So we both took to cleaning the snow off the right vehicle and we got in and just as we pull onto the highway, the snow suddenly stops. This is New England, so one shouldn't get all happy and cheery when an event like this happens because it isn't long before it starts again and when it does it comes twofold as heavy as it first was.
But, you need to be in a car with Dragon when she sees a snow bow. That would be a rainbow that one sees after a snowstorm, happens here with some frequency, so to me it be no big deal. But to a person who isn't used to seeing a snow bow, when it does occur it is quite a sight. It was very pretty to look around at the wonderland of white. We started off down the highway with her yakking about what she bought, with no questions to me about what my therapist had to say. As we made our way through rather heavy traffic, the woman explodes with amazement at the snow bow (I neglected to point it out because I be used to seeing them, just like thunder snow, no biggy up here), she sees the thing and she flips me her phone and says to take a photo because snow bows are so rare. I at first had no clue what she was yammering about but she was pointing and eventually, I saw it had moved just out of me sight line. I told her we were not at a good angle to get a good shot so she decided to ride around to find that perfect setting for a phone photo. I tell ya!
So as we are pulling up to these traffic lights of which there are a few just down from the mall where the highways converge, and she is ducking her head under the dash and looking up to see if there is a view from below and then she is cocking her head this way and that and to look at her, she looked suspicious, especially since we were stopped by a bank. This behaviour did not go unnoticed by the local police who had pulled up next to us in the other lane at the light. The officer sat there watching her looking very puzzled until he saw the bank. Then he looked not puzzled at all but suspicious she was casing the joint. Oh yeah, I could read his face perfectly and I was trying to tell Dragon out of the side of my mouth, not to do what she was doing, that she was about to be pulled over. And we were.
Oh yes, as the light changed, the siren did that thing that means pull to the side of the road and of course we did and he got out and asked her if there was a problem as her behaviour warranted she might be impaired, or she was trying to find a way to the bank across the way. I knew that was an excuse to pull her over for suspicious behaviour. She got it instantly and pointed to the now snow bow-less grey sky just as the heavy snowflakes came whirling back. Yup, she tried to explain there was a snow bow and he, like moi, looked around and of course, by then it was gone and you could hardly see for the heavy falling snow. Well, she explained the best she could and the officer gave it up and told her to move on. Yup, he did.
She lucked out with no warning or anything, but what could he cite her for really? I wanted to tell him she drives a broom without a license, but well . . .
Gabe
Copyright © 2014 All rights reserved
R. Linda:
This week Dragon flew in on her broom to "help take care of the poor invalid." That would be me. I want you to know I have been doing very well on me own and certainly the last person in the world I want to care for me be me mother-in-law. However, she's here, I be trapped, nothing to be done about it. SIGH.
Today I had another PT session, this time with another guy, the owner of the place. I called in early because me scheduled 3:00 appointment would be at the height of the snowstorm we are currently having. We have these snow storms it seems on the very days I have PT scheduled, and be it known the snow isn't an inch or two, it's more like the inch an hour for seven to ten hours.
Since I cannot drive safely in the snow, I need a driver. Guess who? Since we both can't fit on her broomstick, it was decided to take me trusty Saturn. Yes, it is still running!
She dropped me off and decided to go across the highway to the mall and do some shopping. Thank God she wasn't in the PT place with me. I could just see them bending me legs backwards and me crying, "Uncle," and Dragon telling them to bend more!
As it was I got quite the workout. I was surprised at the end of it I could stand, let alone walk!
While I was being put into contortions I only thought long skinny balloons could be used for, this other physical therapist stopped by me table in the middle of me pleading for the other therapist to please stop, and asks me if I left a vodka bottle when I was there yesterday.
"NO!" I moaned loudly, "But I could use a shot of it now."
Seems someone had a flask full of vodka they left at the table I had been working on. Wasn't me, I'd have had Irish whiskey, but someone had that flask.
Just as the torture stopped for me to catch me breath before it began again, I thought to scan the room for the vodka flask because I was tempted. However, me mobile phone text messaging was going off (I have the Sherwood Forest trumpet sound for Dragon), so I knew it was her. I ignored it. Wrong move, she came in to see "What are you doing?" Like she didn't know.
I told her I had fifteen more minutes of fun and I'd be out.
"Okay then, I am going out to wipe off the car. The snow is really coming down." And off she went and back to the torture went I -- vodka-less.
I happened to look out the large window at the parking lot trying to get me mind off the pain and who do I see but the Dragon with a long snow brush brushing off the car. I noticed she got one side done and started the other. Then as she got that side done, she sees she has to go back and brush off the other side because the snow is falling faster than she can clear the windows. Then something occurred to me, yes it did . . . she was clearing off someone else's car. Yes, she was. I started laughing just as me legs were bent near into me back and because the therapist thought I was mocking the pain, he pushed in more and I came close to screaming like a girl.
Damn, that Dragon!
When I was finally released from hell, I went lurching outside to the snow world of the parking lot and I informed Madame Dragon she was working on the wrong vehicle. Oi! I was of a mind she had found that flask of vodka and that might explain the mental abrasion. So we both took to cleaning the snow off the right vehicle and we got in and just as we pull onto the highway, the snow suddenly stops. This is New England, so one shouldn't get all happy and cheery when an event like this happens because it isn't long before it starts again and when it does it comes twofold as heavy as it first was.
But, you need to be in a car with Dragon when she sees a snow bow. That would be a rainbow that one sees after a snowstorm, happens here with some frequency, so to me it be no big deal. But to a person who isn't used to seeing a snow bow, when it does occur it is quite a sight. It was very pretty to look around at the wonderland of white. We started off down the highway with her yakking about what she bought, with no questions to me about what my therapist had to say. As we made our way through rather heavy traffic, the woman explodes with amazement at the snow bow (I neglected to point it out because I be used to seeing them, just like thunder snow, no biggy up here), she sees the thing and she flips me her phone and says to take a photo because snow bows are so rare. I at first had no clue what she was yammering about but she was pointing and eventually, I saw it had moved just out of me sight line. I told her we were not at a good angle to get a good shot so she decided to ride around to find that perfect setting for a phone photo. I tell ya!
So as we are pulling up to these traffic lights of which there are a few just down from the mall where the highways converge, and she is ducking her head under the dash and looking up to see if there is a view from below and then she is cocking her head this way and that and to look at her, she looked suspicious, especially since we were stopped by a bank. This behaviour did not go unnoticed by the local police who had pulled up next to us in the other lane at the light. The officer sat there watching her looking very puzzled until he saw the bank. Then he looked not puzzled at all but suspicious she was casing the joint. Oh yeah, I could read his face perfectly and I was trying to tell Dragon out of the side of my mouth, not to do what she was doing, that she was about to be pulled over. And we were.
Oh yes, as the light changed, the siren did that thing that means pull to the side of the road and of course we did and he got out and asked her if there was a problem as her behaviour warranted she might be impaired, or she was trying to find a way to the bank across the way. I knew that was an excuse to pull her over for suspicious behaviour. She got it instantly and pointed to the now snow bow-less grey sky just as the heavy snowflakes came whirling back. Yup, she tried to explain there was a snow bow and he, like moi, looked around and of course, by then it was gone and you could hardly see for the heavy falling snow. Well, she explained the best she could and the officer gave it up and told her to move on. Yup, he did.
She lucked out with no warning or anything, but what could he cite her for really? I wanted to tell him she drives a broom without a license, but well . . .
Gabe
Copyright © 2014 All rights reserved
3 comments:
LMAO You must have done something REALLY bad in your last life! You got double hell payback this time. LOL therapy AND dragon.
i have yet to see a snow bow in my neck of the woods. thundersnow = scary. your therapist must think you are the bendable Gumby toy lol
Gees, did I leave my flask again? I tell ya, that PT stuff, and I know, can drive you to drink! LOL
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