17 March, 2014

Weasil's wallet gets a direct hit in the donuts

17 March 2014
729

R. Linda:

So here it be, I be taking a year off of celebrating St. Paddy's Day. With all the snow on the ground, it doesn't look like St. Paddy's Day. The price of lamb is sky high and that too doesn't help make it seem like St. Paddy's Day and add to that, the store only had Guinness in cans! THAT be decidedly NOT like St. Paddy's Day to be drinking the good stuff out of a can!

I did, however, take the day off anyway. I thought to catch up on some sleep but me dog started barking at 4 in the morning at God knows what that came out of the woods to feed at the bird feeder. I have a sneaking suspicion what came out of the woods was Weasil and why? Because at 7:00 a.m. when I went to the door to get me morning paper, there was the Weasil's car parked in front of me abode WITH the Weasil in it sipping coffee and munching on green donuts.

I was hoping me brain was playing tricks on me telling me that each St. Paddy's Day I somehow end up with a visit by the Weasil, but he was really there because the door of the red Mustang opened and out came himself greeting me with "Top o' the morning' ta ya Gabbie." Oh yeah, "and the rest of the day to you Weasil" you non-Irishman. Only a non-Irish person would say such to an authentic Irish person, thereby alerting the authentic Irish person that the other person isn't Irish at all.

So there we were, me blurry-eyed and getting pissed off and the Weasil (still chewing and smiling), chewed his way passed me and into me abode, stepping on me newspaper in the process, which I had me hand on to pick up and of course I couldn't because of his big foot on it that left a large dirty and snowy wet footprint. I left the paper being now in a bit of a wee snit I did - Happy St. Pat's Day to me indeed.

Well, as the day isn't over YET and Weasil being fully informed I be not celebrating THE day, he suggested to put me in a "goodly moodie" he'd drive me to Dunks for a hot coffee and a dozen green St. Pat's Day donuts. Well, no one in me house wanted the dozen green donuts so early in the morning, so I went off for coffee, just to get him out of the house so the kiddos could get ready for school without Weasil pulling shenanigans on them, and so Tonya wouldn't be a crazy person as Weasil tends to have that effect upon me darling wife.

Off to Dunks, we went and there was such a line of cars we went across the road to a mom-and-pop's donut place complete with drive-thru and it was festive there too! The line of cars in front was busy buying green donuts with their coffee so by the time we got up to order there were no more green donuts (the Weasil wanted to buy me one) so we got two coffees instead. As the Weasil whipped out his cash we were asked if we'd like to pay it forward as the car in front had paid for us. And Weasil, being a good Joe, said sure he would how much was the order for the car behind us and he was told what it was, and well, I had to laugh to meself because the Weasil got a tab bigger than what the two coffees would cost us if they weren't paid for by the car that had been in front of us. Yes, the Weasil had a bill for $43.56 in donuts and Joe because the car behind us (I have to assume) was buying for an office. Yes, and he paid it he did. He had this sick smile on his face he did as he fished out his bills.

"Do ya have change of a hundred?" He asked the girl at the window.

"I do not, but you could pay the next four cars and call it even." She said with a huge benevolent St. Paddy's Day smile.

There was dead silence for a moment and then (I think because I was with him and he didn't want to seem like the stingy Scotsman) he nodded and reluctantly handed over the hundred-dollar bill. She handed over the two coffees.

"I guess we can call that even," I chuckled as he pulled off.

"Gabbie, datty dere was highway robbery!" He said flipping the tab on his coffee.

He took a sip and it was hot enough it burned the roof of his mouth to add more injury to the already insulted Weasil.

All morning long I have heard this incident repeated in exaggerated story form by the Weasil, who I think is either looking for sympathy or a shoulder to cry on.

This be the second time something like this has happened in the "paying forward" network of good deeds.

Here be the warning of the day: I want to say, be careful of paying forward. You may be paying for a lot more than just a cup of coffee. It seems like a nice idea and it will make you feel good about yourself, UNLESS you get someone behind you who has ordered the entire store. You could just say "THIS is for the coffee order behind me," and hope it is just for coffee and not every single donut on the shelves, which be what Weasil should have done. Anyway, good luck with that!

Gabe
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4 comments:

mobit22 said...

LMAO

the burned palate was a good payback for the soggy newspaper and his early morning visit, don't you think?LOL

Fionnula said...

boom goes the money! lmao i'd think this enough to sever the young weasil and donuts for a very long time

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

It was! Burned palate and burned wallet. Kinda like wallet Karma don't you think?

Anonymous said...

May I wish you a belated St. Patrick's Day in spite of your visit by the Weasil? It sounds Weasil got his just desserts and that should please you, does me!