03 December, 2014

Thanksgiving in New Hampshire - Not Exacty A Currier And Ives Picture

03 December 2014
758

R. Linda:

You know how much I like me turkey and of all the American holidays, THANKSGIVING be me fav. Yes, it was. Well, not anymore it isn't.

Let me start with Wednesday last, shall I? Me house was in a flurry of activity it was, yes the turkey day shopping had been done, the preparations for the next day were about to commence and all was right with the turkey prep world. Except for one small detail, a few of the items needed to cook the bird were sold out at the market. Oh no, what to do? I'll tell you what was done, I was sent to the store! And another small detail, it started to snow. Not flurries, I mean snow in earnest that you couldn't see two feet in front of you for the white stuff like you find in Colorado. A sheet of white is the best way to describe this. Well, okay it started sticking on the grass but the pavement was too warm and this meant only one thing, since it was surmised by the womenfolk that this was a STORM, that yours truly should go out and get what was missing from the shopping list, since I was not included in turkey prep. For joy!

Here, take a look outside at the time, it was doing THIS!



So off I went and the roads were not bad at all. I got to the small mini-mart and I found most of what was sold out at the big market the day before and out I go into . . . into a blizzard! I was like what happened? I was inside the market for no more than 10 minutes and I came out to two inches of snow! I got everything and myself back in the Saturn and started for home and found someone put skis on me car because I was sliding all over kingdom come. Somehow I fishtailed my way home and then had to get me vehicle up Mt. Everest which was me neighbour's driveway. Well, R. Linda the beginning of the drive goes straight up it does, so I know not to slow down because if I do I will slide down. So I gun the Saturn and like a bat out of hell I start up and I am almost to the top when the auto goes into a skid and I release everything and slide back down. So I step on the gas but me tyres spin. Again and again same thing, Gabriel is going nowhere. I back down the road, stop to put the gear in drive and spin the tyres again! Now I am getting frustrated which is another word for angrier than an Irishman banned from a pub. I back the auto down further and before I stop, ram the gear into drive (yes, I know I could ruin the transmission) and Gonzo's your father I am off like Sterling Moss in a Grand Prix start. Up that sucker, I go and slam down on the other side free of the incline and because I had momentum going I kept me big hopper on the pedal and roared on passed me old neighbour's house on up me non-existent driveway to my abode. I vaguely remember seeing the old man's face as he looked out his large window admiring the landscape as I shot by a blur in a bluish silver bullet up into the woods. I think amazed and stunned would adequately describe his expression.

I got up to the abode and found that stepping on the brakes was a waste of time because now I was driving sideways! Yes, on passed my own abode and nearly to the old shed before I stopped facing the way I came. I tell ya! Well, nothing to be done about that, so I shrugged, gathered the sack of what was missing items that no longer were, and out I went to find . . . wait for it . . . I was stepping out not on snow, but snow covering black ice and down me and sack go! I was floundering out there for five minutes trying to get my footing and no one in me abode was looking out the window to help me but one person and that person was me youngest and he doesn't talk yet! Though it looked to me from me position on the ground that he was laughing.

I finally got meself and the sack up off the frozen ground, and I was literally ice skating without skates to my front stoop. I thought it sounded awfully quiet and realised the freaking power was gone out!

I dumped the shopping bag on the table and immediately I was told to go back outside to the shed where I had just been and go get dry firewood from inside because it was going to be a long day and probably night and the next day and day after that because in New Hampshire when one loses power it isn't for an hour, no it's for WEEKS ON END!

I was mumbling it was much too early for this crap to be going down, and slamming wood and generally having a free for all of wood-slinging mayhem in the shed. So I get three slippery trips of wood in with our dog bouncing around me barking because she thinks all this wood toting is fun, and finally get a couple of the hearths going, sit me exhausted self down only to be told to get up the fuel truck has pulled in and tell them we don't need fuel because we have no power. Oi! Without thinking about this, and this was told me by my own sainted mam, I went out jacket-less in the blizzard and informed the driver we didn't want any fuel. He was happy to get the hell out of Dodge as he told me he had spent over 30 minutes trying to get up the old man's driveway to me abode. I'd say I watched him tool on up to Lois's but the snow was so thick I couldn't see which way he went. He could be lost in the woods for all I knew.

When I came in the door the kiddos were pointing and laughing at me, and I knew why with a glance in the hall mirror, I looked like a snowman, that's how covered I was. Tonya got me towels to dry off and asked me what I was doing outside without a coat and when I told her she looked at me like I had half a brain.

"That's great Gabriel, you saved some money but you know the electricity will come on and we won't have any fuel. Go back out there and hunt the fuel guy down."

Ohhh.

Ouch.

Uh no.

Yes, I had succumbed to me Irish Mam's way of stretching a pound or saving one by thinking I was still in Ireland when I realised just where I was. O M G the woman has done things like that to me since she's been here. She lulls me into reminiscing about the old sod and me like a dumb eejit starts thinking I still be there. Well, being COLD will teach me, won't it?

I was driven from me reverie by being told to go out and get the generator out of the shed, and to look for the fuel driver while I was at it, but this time wear a coat, hat, goloshes and gloves. This I did, still wet to the skin thinking the entire time I would have pneumonia by midnight and nothing of this will matter. I don't have to tell you I could see hide nor hair of the fuel truck.

I got the kid's sleigh and heaved the generator on it and pulled it toward the side of the house where the connections were. I got the fuel, poured it in, and then pulled on the cord to start it. Nothing. I must have pulled that cord fifty times before I remembered I didn't get the fuel pump fixed last summer like I was reminded so often by the wife.  Oh boy was I in deep pooh. I stood there remembering the generator's problem as the fuel I just poured in, poured out of the bottom of it onto the ground. Oh, and not to mention the kiddos when seeing me with the sleigh, had got dressed to the nines in snow gear, all for me to pull them through the heavy thick snow to the sound of the silent generator. So I had three pointing (ok two pointing) children telling me the generator was bleeding I must have hurt it when I kicked it. Uh-huh.

In the process of pulling kiddos through heavy snow, I did have a reason of mind to call me old neighbour and ask him if he could look at me generator if I brought it down to his workshop by the barn. He was gracious I should say, and so with kiddos slogging along with me, I had got the generator back on the sleigh and pulled that sucker what seemed like two miles to my neighbour.

To make a long story short, he tinkered with it and said he could rig the fuel pump with some glue because it was cracked and he did. We had to leave it to dry and then we'd know if it worked or not. This, after the two of us drained what was left of the fuel which was no easy or light job.

All the way home I was going to think of a plausible excuse as to WHY the generator was not running to tell Tonya, but the idea of all that glue doing the trick had me thinking it wouldn't work no way, no how, and gees what were he and I thinking until I stepped in the door realising I hadn't thought a good lie up to tell Tonya. So I told her the truth and she was not happy. No, she was not talking to me unhappy, ignoring my existence unhappy, but she did inform me not to get too cosy under down comforters because I'd be making lots of trips to the woodshed all night to keep her, me MOTHER and the kiddos warm. Yup got it, ay ay sir.

The stopping of preparations for Turkey Day took place much to me whining about how we can make do somehow. The word 'somehow' was bandied about that "Somehow YOU forget to service the generator, and now 'somehow' we all would be trying to keep warm and somehow, we'd all be huddled together," except for ME because I'd be keeping warm by going for wood every five minutes.

Well, with the boyos' help, I got the wood stacked so I wasn't going to the woodshed every five minutes. Me old neighbour told me the generator was taking longer for the glue to dry but he thought by tomorrow it would be ready to go. Just come down early and he'd have it ready. He would invite us down but all his family was there and there wasn't much room but we were welcome. I told him I had plenty of wood and we were fine, but I was secretly disappointed the generator wasn't ready.

Meanwhile, there was no lull in the storm and it continued. By evening I could hear the hum of generators when I took the dog out as I got more wood. Inside the house it was getting quite a bit cooler unless you were saddled on up to a fireplace which was rather crowded, one area was pets and kiddos, the other the women, two grumpy women so that was where there was room for me, but truly I couldn't take hearing about me forgetfulness or worse laziness where generators are concerned, so I stayed on the fringes of the warmth. I tell ya even me green blanket was pressed into service by O'Hare putting it around the dog! I started to say something but was quickly hushed by Mam saying, "Well sonny boy, if ye had remembered to git da genny serviced da dog wouldn't be cold."

Me Mam boiled water over the fire and we had warm tea and cold biscuits. The turkey was fine, it was cold so not going bad, but the idea of having a turkey and not getting to eat it was dispiriting, to say the least. There was some discussion on grilling it outside, but oh yes Gabriel, let the propane run out so THAT idea was no good. Well, we could get a giant stick and rotisserie the bird over the fire, but no THAT idea wouldn't fly because we'd cause one hell of a grease fire and set the abode ablaze. BUT (I pointed out) we'd all be warm! No one laughed so that was me last attempt at humour and getting into their good graces.

After a rather sleepless, cold night the day dawned like snow never happened.

Glorious Thanksgiving Day and well . . . still no power.

I went to the neighbour's and we filled the generator and tried it and wow it actually held the fuel and it worked! I packed it back up on the sleigh and installed it by the side of the house and was never so happy to hear the hum of the thing. I ran inside turned on lights and informed the womenfolk turkey could be started, only to be told, that the hook up for the generator did not include the oven only the stove and the bird was too big for stove top cooking. So there!

Yup, I had the electrician make sure the heat, water, some lights, stove and fridge worked. Not the oven though. Yes, me fault once again. Say nothing, just know I can hear what you are thinking.

It was declared by me uneducated in New Hampshire Power little grey-haired, apple-cheeked Mam, that tomorrow we'd celebrate the day with the turkey since for sure the power would be back up. I looked at Tonya over me Mam's head and she looked at me like - who is going to tell her and break her heart that there will be no turkey tomorrow either. I did, yes, I had no choice because it was mouthed at me, "She's YOUR mother, YOU tell her." Oh, the disappointment in the little woman when I had to sit her down she didn't up and swoon away.

We had no clue anyone but our town was out of power. I found out after that this was the fourth biggest power outage ever in the state, 60% with no roasting turkeys! I thought the mega snowstorm on Halloween a few years back was bad, but when it comes to a favourite food not being cooked on THE day well . . . I can only say it wasn't just us in a grumpy mood. 60% of the state was not happy, a clear reason for revolt from the power companies.

For a whole day, we saw no power crew, we heard nothing and certainly smelled no turkey dinner cooking. The next day being in a fouler mood it dawned like this:

Really cold that the snow wasn't melting

It was shortly after I took this picture I ran out of petrol for the generator. Yup. Not only that, I ran out of petrol for the furnace too. Oh and yes, you know it I heard about both. I called the fuel people and asked them to come out and put fuel in the furnace tanks. Then I syphoned petrol out of me car for me generator. Yes, I did. So my generator fired up, but me auto didn't. But at least I wasn't driving around looking for a petrol station which I already knew was not running as no one had power restored as of then.

The fuel guy pulled up none too happy to have had to attempt Mr. Everest a second time when the first would have been enough -- had I let him fill the tanks. The lack of turkey made him as grumpy as the rest of us I suppose.

It was shortly after I drained me auto of fuel which I had thought twice of doing, that the power came on and now I had an auto that had no petrol. Yes, Murphy's Law is alive and well and still incorporated at me abode!

Anyway, turkey was had a few days late, it wasn't as wonderful a dinner as it usually was because we were all still fighting off the chill and grumpy to have had to entertain each other (if you can call it that). The worst thing about losing power wasn't the loss of a hot delicious turkey dinner, no it was the fact we had NO CABLE!

We had no news of the outside world AND worst of all, there was no TELLY to watch. No, notta, nothing. I tell ya one can lose one's sanity without Cable TV. When forced to talk with family members fighting or misunderstandings ensue. Board games one can play for just so long before rampant cheating starts and more arguments destroy any fun one might have had as a cheating winner. So there was THAT little detail that has been very painful to write about. I don't understand why me emails all come once a day and I could send but one email, and that was it. The wife was upset over all the discount coupons for Black Friday and such she couldn't print off or retrieve them. Me, it was the freaking CABLE! How is it we could get emails and send but one email, but no cable? I simply don't understand.

I wanted to share the misery with your wee self since I know you've been there, done that.

Gabe
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12 comments:

Fionnula said...

i thought you dropped off the face of the earth! sorry your holiday was a working one lamo. love the pictures looks like up here but with more fields. keep writing!

mobit22 said...

Roflmao YUP BUT have you ever thought of an electric roasting pan when power came in? Oh well,you should have made a snow angel. I think only good thing s for you since you seem to be wearing a kick me sign.

Tomas said...

Snow and you didn't snowshoe? You stayed huddle inside by a fire all day? Man, you could have taken advantage of some great weather! I was stunned you had a new story up, I thought you retired!

mobit22 said...

He CAN'T retire I wont let him!

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

Oh funny fella you be. Retired? Yeah like me muse would allow THAT to happen.

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

See, the old ball and chain, LMAO

Anonymous said...

I remember the floods more than the power outages. However, I did laugh at you, you do always get into trouble even when you mean not to. I thought with your disappearance you had left us all to our own devices, but when I saw the new story, I thought it an early Yule gift you were gracing us once again with your humour. Don't make it a one time gift, I for one, need your stories. Keeps me from the deep end of things. Ah and Gabe, be nice to your Muse or I'll take her away, she does so like my hair.

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

I have a bone to pick with You sir. I hear you were in me neck of the woods visiting relatives in New Hampshire. Notta jingle, notta text, notta word. I feel I be chopped liver. And hands off the Muse!

Anonymous said...

Gabe, I don't know of whom you are referring. I have no relatives in New Hampshire. I lived there for a short while in Walpole but no more. Who told you such a thing?

mobit22 said...

Ahhhhh! THE HAIR is back! I LOVE good hair! Master Gabe IS good to me. He sends me ducks or zombies,LOL I STILL have the beefeater duck in a place of honor!

Gabriel O'Sullivan said...

Really Musie, you're going there? He bought you a British Duck and he's got great hair, so what. I write the stories that make you laugh, so come on! Which is it great hair and a rubber duckie or stories?

mobit22 said...

LMAO you win! The stories are what keep me.alive!