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17 December 2016
R. Linda:
Is it Halloween or Christmas season? The reason I ask is last night at 3 a.m. Tonya and I were awakened by creepy music blaring quite loudly. We both awoke at the same time shouting at each other asking WHAT IS GOING ON? Being rudely awakened from a sleep induced coma one is not very sharp on the brain nor can one see in the dark through sleepy and blurry vision. The music was coming from Tonya's side and she be a lot quicker than me, as she turned on the light.
"I thought so!" She said pointing at Alexa. "Alexa STOP," she shouted pushing the blankets aside which instantly had me chilled. Why she had to remove the blankets from me side I dunno, but it was not appreciated because now I was wide awake and shivering.
Alexa was the culprit and as soon as Tonya demanded her to stop playing that bizarre music, she did.
"I don't know what got into her," I said sliding the blankets back over me shaking body.
"I don't either, but that's the second time she's done that. The other afternoon I came home from work, no one was at home and I could hear country music (which I hate), playing from our room. It took all my courage to go up and see what was going on. No one here, just . . . ," and she pointed at Alexa, "just HER."
Well, this was the first I'd heard about THAT so I patted the bed and told her to come back where it was warm, I was sure the excitement was over and she (Tonya) having a nasty cold would catch her chill if she stood out of bed too much longer.
Neither of us got back to sleep after that. We tossed and turned, me wondering how it was the machine turned itself on and her wondering if one of the kiddos programmed Alexa to play music at odd hours, but really? If Dragon was here I'd be suspicious.
We did ask the three boyos and me Mam if anyone was playing a trick because it wasn't a kind trick. Everyone genuinely looked astonished. Me Mam had heard the commotion and almost came to see what the matter was, but heard us and our voice tone sounded no alarmed so she went back to sleep. Lucky her!
The boyos said they heard nothing, which be not unusual as growing laddies tend to sleep deeply and well, something I wish I could do.
It had been snowing since the wee hours and was coming down heavily at breakfast time. Me Mam fixed breakfast telling Tonya to sit and she'd do it all. She set Tonya with a cup of tea first thing which knowing me wife, wasn't what she had in mind being a coffee shark like me, but she weakly smiled and sipped. I knew it was all she could do not to dump it in the sink and pour a cup of the real stuff. Being she has a bad cold and cough, I volunteered to go out to gather the breakfast eggs from the chicken coop. Ah yes, I did. Having had no sleep and no training in chicken management I had no clue what I was doing. I thought it was simple, go out feed the greedy suckers, make sure they had water, fresh bedding, and that all were accounted for. Then while they ate, gather the eggs. That was the plan, but it was tough because as soon as they saw ME, they all ran to the other side of the coop except for four of the hens sitting in the nesting boxes.
I decided, good the gang is all here after I counted nodding heads, and so since they were in a corner I cleaned their bedding, refreshed it all the time with them clucking at me like where's the food you bozo? This I got and put in the feed thingee and then the water. The gang of four in the nesting boxes made no move to join the others. So, I gathered the exposed eggs and then tried to shoo the four holdouts but they wouldn't move, only tried to peck at me. I got a stick from outside and tried to move them from their behinds but no, they pecked at that too and put up such a ruckus I couldn't hear meself think.
I left them to it and when I got inside was told to go back for the rest, or we'd have young chicks and this was not the time for baby chicks to hatch. I had forgot the egg basket in me dilemma so I needed to go back anyway. I trudged through the rapidly deepening snow back to the coop where I found the gang of cannibals eating one of their young. Yes, R. Linda an egg had broken open and they were all of them vying for the dripping stuff. I was shocked and aghast. I thought only pigs did that, I had no idea chickens were cannibals too! Well, live and learn Gabe.
The four holdouts were in that fray so it was easy to gather the eggs they had been sitting on, and get out of Dodge without a problem. Only there was a problem. I had let the eggs sit too long and when I put the warm eggs on the top, as soon as I hit the Arctic blast outside the eggs started to explode. I was covered in runny yoke!
Holy Cannoli I had, out of sixteen eggs, five left. Three cracked the others I was wearing. I was a bloody mess to say the least. When I stamped on in the family was pointing at the yellow stains, some laughing behind their hands and the rest looking horrified.
"Did dey pelt ye wit eggs?" Me Mam asked trying to keep a straight face.
"Did you fall down?" O'Hare asked somewhat concerned, but not really because he started giggling and had to leave the room where I could hear huge peels of laughter coming from the living room.
"None of that, as soon as I walked outside, they exploded on me person." I said putting the basket in the sink and informing the chef what was left for breakfast.
"I should have told you to take a warm tea towel, one for the bottom of the basket and one to cover the eggs with. Sorry, I wasn't thinking." Tonya said sipping coffee her eyes on the emptied tea cup. I guess by that time she had downed the tea and got what she really wanted and her brain began to work, only too late for me, I was already outside in the deep freeze. She had a smug look on her face which made me think she didn't just remember about the warm towels, she knew all along and was blaming it on the tea.
"We will git ye a hazmat suit fur next tyme, doncha worry." Me Mam said, trying to control her amusement.
Guess what ladies? Not going to be a next time. The laughing boyos can do it. At least the two older ones. I found out O'Hare has gathered the eggs many a time and knows how to clean, water and feed the cannibals without getting pecked to death for his trouble.
That's taken care of now I have to solve the Alexa mystery. Oh and one more thing on that. We ordered a Dot for downstairs. Am I concerned? You might say I be that.
Gabe
Copyright © 2016 All rights reserved
17 December 2016
R. Linda:
Is it Halloween or Christmas season? The reason I ask is last night at 3 a.m. Tonya and I were awakened by creepy music blaring quite loudly. We both awoke at the same time shouting at each other asking WHAT IS GOING ON? Being rudely awakened from a sleep induced coma one is not very sharp on the brain nor can one see in the dark through sleepy and blurry vision. The music was coming from Tonya's side and she be a lot quicker than me, as she turned on the light.
"I thought so!" She said pointing at Alexa. "Alexa STOP," she shouted pushing the blankets aside which instantly had me chilled. Why she had to remove the blankets from me side I dunno, but it was not appreciated because now I was wide awake and shivering.
Alexa was the culprit and as soon as Tonya demanded her to stop playing that bizarre music, she did.
"I don't know what got into her," I said sliding the blankets back over me shaking body.
"I don't either, but that's the second time she's done that. The other afternoon I came home from work, no one was at home and I could hear country music (which I hate), playing from our room. It took all my courage to go up and see what was going on. No one here, just . . . ," and she pointed at Alexa, "just HER."
Well, this was the first I'd heard about THAT so I patted the bed and told her to come back where it was warm, I was sure the excitement was over and she (Tonya) having a nasty cold would catch her chill if she stood out of bed too much longer.
Neither of us got back to sleep after that. We tossed and turned, me wondering how it was the machine turned itself on and her wondering if one of the kiddos programmed Alexa to play music at odd hours, but really? If Dragon was here I'd be suspicious.
We did ask the three boyos and me Mam if anyone was playing a trick because it wasn't a kind trick. Everyone genuinely looked astonished. Me Mam had heard the commotion and almost came to see what the matter was, but heard us and our voice tone sounded no alarmed so she went back to sleep. Lucky her!
The boyos said they heard nothing, which be not unusual as growing laddies tend to sleep deeply and well, something I wish I could do.
It had been snowing since the wee hours and was coming down heavily at breakfast time. Me Mam fixed breakfast telling Tonya to sit and she'd do it all. She set Tonya with a cup of tea first thing which knowing me wife, wasn't what she had in mind being a coffee shark like me, but she weakly smiled and sipped. I knew it was all she could do not to dump it in the sink and pour a cup of the real stuff. Being she has a bad cold and cough, I volunteered to go out to gather the breakfast eggs from the chicken coop. Ah yes, I did. Having had no sleep and no training in chicken management I had no clue what I was doing. I thought it was simple, go out feed the greedy suckers, make sure they had water, fresh bedding, and that all were accounted for. Then while they ate, gather the eggs. That was the plan, but it was tough because as soon as they saw ME, they all ran to the other side of the coop except for four of the hens sitting in the nesting boxes.
I decided, good the gang is all here after I counted nodding heads, and so since they were in a corner I cleaned their bedding, refreshed it all the time with them clucking at me like where's the food you bozo? This I got and put in the feed thingee and then the water. The gang of four in the nesting boxes made no move to join the others. So, I gathered the exposed eggs and then tried to shoo the four holdouts but they wouldn't move, only tried to peck at me. I got a stick from outside and tried to move them from their behinds but no, they pecked at that too and put up such a ruckus I couldn't hear meself think.
I left them to it and when I got inside was told to go back for the rest, or we'd have young chicks and this was not the time for baby chicks to hatch. I had forgot the egg basket in me dilemma so I needed to go back anyway. I trudged through the rapidly deepening snow back to the coop where I found the gang of cannibals eating one of their young. Yes, R. Linda an egg had broken open and they were all of them vying for the dripping stuff. I was shocked and aghast. I thought only pigs did that, I had no idea chickens were cannibals too! Well, live and learn Gabe.
The four holdouts were in that fray so it was easy to gather the eggs they had been sitting on, and get out of Dodge without a problem. Only there was a problem. I had let the eggs sit too long and when I put the warm eggs on the top, as soon as I hit the Arctic blast outside the eggs started to explode. I was covered in runny yoke!
Holy Cannoli I had, out of sixteen eggs, five left. Three cracked the others I was wearing. I was a bloody mess to say the least. When I stamped on in the family was pointing at the yellow stains, some laughing behind their hands and the rest looking horrified.
"Did dey pelt ye wit eggs?" Me Mam asked trying to keep a straight face.
"Did you fall down?" O'Hare asked somewhat concerned, but not really because he started giggling and had to leave the room where I could hear huge peels of laughter coming from the living room.
"None of that, as soon as I walked outside, they exploded on me person." I said putting the basket in the sink and informing the chef what was left for breakfast.
"I should have told you to take a warm tea towel, one for the bottom of the basket and one to cover the eggs with. Sorry, I wasn't thinking." Tonya said sipping coffee her eyes on the emptied tea cup. I guess by that time she had downed the tea and got what she really wanted and her brain began to work, only too late for me, I was already outside in the deep freeze. She had a smug look on her face which made me think she didn't just remember about the warm towels, she knew all along and was blaming it on the tea.
"We will git ye a hazmat suit fur next tyme, doncha worry." Me Mam said, trying to control her amusement.
Guess what ladies? Not going to be a next time. The laughing boyos can do it. At least the two older ones. I found out O'Hare has gathered the eggs many a time and knows how to clean, water and feed the cannibals without getting pecked to death for his trouble.
That's taken care of now I have to solve the Alexa mystery. Oh and one more thing on that. We ordered a Dot for downstairs. Am I concerned? You might say I be that.
Gabe
Copyright © 2016 All rights reserved
10 comments:
ROFLMAO now THAT would have been great picture material! REVENGE OF THE EGG MAN! Never a dull moment at your house
Surprised they didn't fry you up if everyone was that sleepy. Omelette Gabe du jour anyone? LMAO
lol you must have been a sight!
Forget the omelette du jour that creepy music would do it for me. A haunted chair, now a haunted Alexa, what next I wonder.
I personally think that creepy music is fun! Getting splattered with raw egg, not so much
Maybe Alexa (whatever that is) was trying to warn you with creepy music that you were about to be bombed with eggs? An aside here: I have more trouble signing in and now have three accounts on this blog. You might want to fix that on your end if you can Gabe. Sorry. Nice to see Poldark is back LOL.
I don't know if I can fix that. I will look.
Oh come now Lucky. You love that creepy stuff lol. Halloween????
Birthday? Not creepy yet. Music playing in thin air? Creepy.
Haha. I didn't mean your birthday was creepy meant being born on that day nothing should bother you spooky wise lol
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